Okay, we are about to get deep.
This is not a subject I know well from experience because I’ve done it–but it is something I’ve seen around me because so many people I know have. I might be mistaken about some things, so if you feel like you need to check me on something please do. And we are going to have a few installments on this very volatile and complex subject.
First let me say this. We all may not know what our mates will do when we aren’t around because no one is in your partner’s mind. However, you DO know the basic moral character of your mate. It’s just that some of us overlook the flaws we see and hope that it’s not as bad as we fear that it is. But how many times has something been revealed to you and you ended up saying to yourself, “Dammit, I KNEW it!” That’s right, baby–you knew your man; you just chose to overlook it. Rarely will a woman be surprised 100% by something your man does. No, you knew it all along, you just were either in denial or you were hoping that you were mistaken about it.
That said, a brother is either a good man or he isn’t. If he is a good man, no matter what you do, he will be faithful. Now he might break up with you, but he won’t cheat. Cheating is something that either people will or they won’t. In my last 3 marriages, I was with cheaters. Not that I caught them or anything, but when they got mad, they would threaten to cheat (which explains how they could be fine, educated and 40 and STILL single). That behavior told me that it was something they’d consider; and perhaps they did it or perhaps they didn’t. But you don’t let shit come out of your mouth that ain’t already in your head. For example, can you imagine your man saying, “well if I was gay, I’d fuck ____.” Hell no. If a dude said that, he’s a homo. For reals. Or, “damn, I need a hit of some crack.” Nigga get real, open your eyes! LOL
So don’t ever think that you did something that caused one of your exes to cheat. Or that broad at your ex’s job with the big titties somehow seduced your man. Or that he was doing it to get back at you. A dude ain’t going to do it unless it’s in his DNA–no more than he’d suck a dick cause he got too drunk.
I read an article once–I think it was in Essence magazine–where the author talked of “driving a man into the arms of another woman”. Man, whatever. I bet you there is a woman who allows her man to cheat on her because she puts the blame everywhere else except for the sorry mother fucker she got with. I repeat: There is nothing you can do to make a non-cheater cheat.
But you can learn to identify the signs that your man is a piece of shit, or has cheater-like qualities. And the signs are as follows:
But not tonight. Next time. (Gotta build up suspense for Part II!) Thanks for visiting my blog.